Is it me or are there a lot of love relationships in trouble these days? It seems everyone I meet is having problems, be they married, living together, dating, straight, gay or bi. Parallel relationships, as I call them (aka affairs) are everywhere. Maybe it’s because I seem like Dear Abby to people and they feel they can vent to me. Of course, I hear a lot of the same things from a lot of people, “I’m just not getting enough sex.” “She/He’s always tired or just doesn’t want to be bothered.” “The kids…” “We’re having financial problems.” Etc., etc. Hmmm! I simply think some people are just burned out, bored with longevity and like variety, or are discovering that life is really short and they are with the wrong person…I could go on. After all, a lot of us are suffering from the recession/depression and economic blues. We’ve endured what seems like gargantuan losses in some cases. When bank managers and doctors tell me grown men are crying in their offices, you know the losses must be huge! We’re under pressure to perform in all areas of our lives like never before or else. When you’re tired, burned out, stressed and not getting enough sleep, I’ve found a lot of deep, underlying issues surface; problems in relationships being at the top.
I’m not one for much suffering in a relationship because I believe when you’re with the right person the suffering is naturally minimal. I do believe in as much honesty as possible in love relationships because it helps both people set the course of what their relationship is going to be. We can’t be all things to each other. The idea of monogamy … not sure if this is really a natural thing anymore and perhaps many are thinking the same thing and just not saying it … to the other party in their relationship.
It’s easy to find solace in others, especially those who are going through the same thing. With the ease of access to each other thru smartphones, technology, social media, changes in thought patterns, online dating sites for singles and those involved in relationships, and the like, it’s easy to understand why these parallel relationships are so common.
Of course, owning several adult online stores that have “couples departments,” I ask if they’ve thought of visiting the sites with their loved one and perhaps ordering some things they’ve never tried before like sexy lingerie, massage products, and romance enhancers aka sex toys. For me it’s like Christmas when that package(s) arrives, and I can’t wait to play! We’re excited all over again. Visit our Couples Department at Carmelle’s Treasures for some ideas to purchase, play and renew your passion.
And then, if you decide to go your separate ways, heal yourself and move on as quickly as possible. I’ve known many people who get stuck and are not able to move on. I accompanied a friend to a divorce support group at a church in Las Vegas many years ago. Here is the book they were using. It was quite comforting even though I was not married but had ended a relationship recently. You can get it by clicking the book above.